a new nephew!

finally a boy has been added to the family....no not mine, but at least my girls have a boy cousin now! Michael Joseph Scott was born on Wednesday, July 29 at 2:40 pm after only five minutes of pushing...craziness! Here's my stolen picture of him...what a cutie! Congratulations go out to my older brother Joseph and his awesome wife Sarah...way to go guys!

Yesterday i felt....well, hurt. I am tempted to say "betrayed" but i don't think that is accurate.

I had made plans with a friend to spend time together tuesday, it's not like we made plans to go somewhere, or to do something specific, just to hang out, and maybe for her that's no big deal because she can "hang out" anytime, with or without me. But for me, this meant time away from my kids to have adult time with my friend. I get adult time with my husband in the evening after the kids go to bed, but the only adult "friend" time i get is with my best friend and pretty much only on my husband's days off which are sunday, monday and tuesday. Nearing the end of his days off, I had called my friend Monday to see if she was available that evening. She was with her boyfriend so i asked about the next day, tuesday. She said other than a dental appointment in the morning that she would be available the whole rest of the day. She did mention during, during our conversation monday evening, that her boyfriend would be leaving for a week long out-of-town vacation with his buddy, but not until the weekend sometime. I knew that she would miss him, but figured that she had plenty of time to spend with him before the weekend, their schedules don't always mesh and i get that but the next day was only tuesday, and he was right there when she told me she was available, he usually speaks up and says something if he thinks there is a conflict. No comment from him meant plans made.

so tuesday.....
i took my older girls to the free movie on tuesday, since i knew the friend's dental appointment could take a while, I waited until around noon to first try to get a hold of her, she often sleeps in too. She didn't answer. So i took my cell phone with me as i went to get my hair colored FINALLY. I've only got four months worth of red growing out blonde...yikes! I thought for sure she'd call me back while i was at the salon.....nope. Now i must say this didn't get me terribly down because she can be bad about checkin her phone, so after a 4 hour hair color i was done and i text her on the way home. She mentions the dental appointment and waits until i ask when we can get together that she says, oh the boyfriend is there. Now i often hang out with her and her boyfriend and i considered that for a moment and then she says that this is the last day she'll have with him before he leaves saturday....not sure how that math works..... so maybe some other day or something. some other day? are you kidding? she knows my free days, my husband's days off are my free days, and since she doesn't seem fond of coming over when my kids are awake, that doesn't give me any time to go over to her house except on the husband's days off, and today is all that is left of it.

Now it used to be that sunday was the hang out day for us, because she was off, and it was one of the husband's days off, but the boyfriend has taken that day, which i understand, with conflicting schedules, this is the ONE day that they are both off, ok, i don't even bug about that anymore. But then monday, she gets off early monday, so i figure that usually gives us time....but every single monday it's boyfriend time instead. and now tuesday too? I lost one best friend this way, now it appears i'm losing another. I totally get that when you are serious about someone you are dating that you want to spend every second with them, i totally get that. I know i was like that while engaged to the husband man. However she is not engaged to this person, at least not that i know of, although considering how luke warm her friendship with me these days seems to be, i suppose they could be and i wouldn't even know it. Anyway, i'm trying to be understanding of where she is in life, i know we're doing totally different things, she works and is un married, i am married and stay home with three kids, i suppose that's about as opposite as it gets. I know i can't fully comprehend being where she is because it has been so long since i was there, but i don't think she even tries to understand what it's like for me. I look forward all week to a chance to hang out with my dearest friend. I spend all day every day surrounded by children, i love them, but i'm starving for a little me time. Our weekly game night used to help but she hasn't been coming to that because of her schedule so i'm the one reaching out trying to make other times to hang out.....and to it appears to me that she doesn't care.

I hate harboring bad feelings toward someone you love and not telling them, because they don't know unless you tell them. So i texted her, i didn't want to call because i didn't want to get overly upset and get into a fight or say something i didn't really mean. So i simply stated my feelings in a text. I told her i felt hurt, i felt that we had made plans and that it was very inconsiderate of her to just pretend that we didn't and devote the whole day to her boyfriend instead. Now i can think of several scenarios here, i mean i could understand hanging out with him until she and i were finally able to get together, then sending him home, they would have had some time together, and she and i would have. I mean i'm not asking her to dump her boyfriend, but this is now the second time in two days that she made it clear to me that her time with her boyfriend couldnt' include me. But i felt like tuesday was our time, our time to connect and talk about girl stuff that he doesn't need to be there for, and instead he took precidence over our plans. Now albeit she says he just showed up and i get that, but he was there when she told me over the phone that she would be available to hang out the next day, so when he showed up i would expect that he would have some respect of those plans. and at least he should have been able to say hey, when Vera comes over i'll head out, or at least ask when i was coming over, instead of now occupying the whole day and closing off my one day to spend time with my friend and get a break from my kids.

I suppose there are many ways to view this, and i know that from her view she probably doesn't feel like she did anything wrong. I'm sure to her it feels perfectly reasonable to want to spend lots of time with this person she cares deeply for. But i wish that she could picture what i do all day every day as work, work with stress and frustration, and see how it would feel to not ever get a day off to spend with someone. Now i know that i have the greatest man in the world for a husband and i love it when he and i get alone time, but there is something fundamentally different about getting alone time with a friend that isn't my husband. He already knows what's going on, sometimes it's fun to tell stories of everyday life to someone who doesn't already know them. I guess that's why i'm writing this as a blog. I mean this conversation i'm having with myself, that is now unfortunatly public view, is the kind of thing i love getting to chat with her about. This is the exact kind of thing she and i are great at, listening to each others problems and helping to solve them. Not that most of our problems ever really need "solving" but it's nice to hear that you're not insane and that someone else totally gets feeling hurt over something like this, and being there to say "i'd feel the same way if it were me." so instead because she's not here to say that, i'm left to say it to the null void of the internet, and to my own mind, i'm tired of losing friends to boyfriends, and sad to say it is often to boyfriends who don't last, and the last friend i lost to a boyfriend, she broke up with him and moved away. And i think we've begun to mend our friendship, but it's hard with such distance between us, i don't want to lose another friend to the black hole of boyfriend-dom. it seems like they suck you in the point that you don't spend anytime with anyone else, then if something does happen between them, there are no friends close enough to reach out to and tell.

Just as i know my friend can't read my mind unless i tell her how i feel, i hope that she knows i can't read hers either, and making excuses for why it was ok to spend that whole day with her boyfriend instead of even carving out a little time for me, i would like to know i'm still valued as her friend, because right now i really don't feel like it.


on the lighter side (literally) my hair looks great and i was really looking forward to showing her.

some more pictures from camping

Katie's first time having s'mores....needless to say...she LOVED them!


Elaine was a "Litter Getter" they give them a bag to fill up with trash and when they bring it back they get a sticker, collect all five stickers and get a surprise, they can't wait to go back and collect more trash!



The Lady Bug class, a puppet, a story, a lesson, a song and an art project...just like kindergarten

Katie's mode of trasportation


tree so big it wouldn't fit in the picture!


(above)Katie loves her daddy so much, you can tell big time in this picture!


splashin around in the river
(above) the stanislaus river from the bridge on the south grove trail
(above) sun through the trees on the south grove trail, beautiful evening!

BIG trees!!

Camping at Calaveras Big Trees

Elaine will be starting Kindergarten in only a few short weeks so we're trying to fit the last of our summer fun into ONE month...JULY! So we took the kids camping at Calaveras Big Trees during Adam's days off last week. So we left Sunday after church and came back Tuesday afternoon. The drive was beautiful and the kids all got good naps on the drive, which was nice. We got to our campsite around 5pm and the unpacking went pretty fast. Adam and I set up the tent in a few minutes and then Adam started the fire so it would have good cooking coals for cooking the hot dogs for dinner and s'mores later. Elaine was obsessed with the idea of s'mores from the moment we told her we were going camping. I don't even know when the last time we had them was, but she certainly expected it, and must have asked four or five times on the drive if we were going to have them that night, so it was a must! While Adam tended the fire i set up the beds in the tent and then we cooked hot dogs and sat around the fire, then enjoyed our s'mores and headed to bed around 8:30pm. It was still a little light outside but Adam and I decided to go to bed when the kids did so as not to wake them when we came into the tent later. Katie loved running around in the tent, it was one of the few places she had freedom, we let her run all over in the tent, our tent is pretty big, it has three rooms and we left the doors to each room open during singing time and prayer. Then we put all three kids in one room for bed, then the middle room was open and Adam and I slept in the third room with an air mattress. The big girls were very excited to use the sleeping bags "santa" brought them for Christmas this year. They're adult size so they'll be useable for years to come, so i just folded the bottom of them under to fit both of them and the play pen in one room of the tent. The night started out pretty well, Katie cried at first when we closed the door to their room, but she fell asleep after a few minutes of crying then we enjoyed the silence and Adam and I drifted off to sleep shortly after. At about 2:30 am, Maggie woke up crying, it wasn't loud but it woke me up instantly and i jumped up and went to their room and unzipped the door. That was all it took to wake up Katie. I comforted Maggie who was merely dissoriented and then i tried to sneak out, but Katie started screaming. It was one thing to let her cry it out at 8:30 in the evening when most other people aren't asleep yet, but not at 2:30 in the morning when the campground is SILENT! I picked her up and comforted her back to sleep and laid her back down, she woke up when i laid her down and the crying continued. so Adam and i took her to bed with us where she tossed and turned and wiggled and cried and eventually fell asleep somewhere around 4am i think (she wanted Adam more than me so i fell asleep sooner than they did) Monday was an early morning, Elaine and Maggie woke up around 6am, up with the sun. we all got up and dressed and had breakfast and headed to the visitors center around 9am, right when it opened. There was a kids class at 10am for 3-6 year olds. The class was all about Lady Bugs and Elaine loved it! Maggie was in a bit of a mood and opted out of this activity. Elaine was very proud of the lady bug picture she painted at the end of the class and we put it on the windshield of the car to dry while we went on a walk around the North Grove.
The North Grove hike was short maybe 2 miles, and very flat and smooth and easy, Katie rode in the backpack carrier with Adam and Maggie and Lainey ran most of the hike. They kept complaining they were tired until we would tell them how strong they were and then they would show off their strength by running ahead, it worked quite well considering i think they were more bored than tired. Adam and i enjoyed the trail and all the GIANT trees, but i don't think the kids were very impressed.
Later that day we went down to the river and let the kids put their feet in, they loved that, so did i! It was hot and Adam and I both really would have rather gone swimming but it just wasn't safe with the kids and the current of the river. Then that evening after dinner we drove all the way to the end of the park and went to the South Grove parking lot. There was maybe one other car there and they were leaving when we were getting ready to head down the trail. The trail was absolutely beautiful, so amazing that despite serious uphill parts of the trail and over 3 miles of hiking there was not a single complaint from the kids. Katie often thrilled us with her " ooh's" and "ahhs" as we hiked , we had to push aside many branches and the trail was almost as opposite as it could get from the North Grove trail, hilly, rocky, and thin....but amazing! the kids really liked the bridge over the river, this part of the river was quite low and on the way back we let the kids play in the water a little bit before finishing the trail back to the car. We were so glad we did this trail and hope to go back again just to do this trail again, it had a side trail that we didn't take and wished we had....so you can bet we'll be back there again soon! Here are some pictures from the adventures!

(above) Elaine and maggie getting ready to get their feet wet in the river

The bridge on the South Grove Trail
hiking up hill on the south grove trail.

last day, had to get this shot before we left, this log was a bench next to the fire pit (metal ring in right side of pic) the kids loved to sit and climb on it!

ARGGGG!!!!

Ok so i know i'm still new to blogging, but why in the heck am i having so much trouble lining up text and pictures, it never comes out the same in the final product as it does in my preview...isn't that the whole point of having a preview option? argg! so frustrated, i need to take a class this!

San Francisco Zoo and Beach

Our Zoo trip happened kinda randomly. My mom, Pat, and her husband, Louis, have two boys ages 9 and 10. Louis' grandson Desi who is 13 and his friend Stephen, who is also 13, were visiting for a while and there had been some boredom and poor behavior going on. Mom and I both felt it was due to a lack of structured time, too much free time. So we decided the next day we'd take all the kids, including my own three girls and all her hoard of boys, to the zoo and then the beach, which was only right across the street from the San Francisco Zoo. Here are a few pictures from our trip!

Here's all the kids together (and a statue of a baby elephant too :) top one in the cap is Stephen, then Lainey, hugging Maggie. Next to Elaine is Sam, and next to him is Ben, these are my brothers, then sitting on the ground is my nephew Desi and he is holding Katie, the sun was in everyone's eyes so that's why they all look cranky :)

Ben, Sam, Louis, Mom






The Giraffe's were Katie's favorite thing! She called them "Gaff" she got so excited and didn't want to to leave them at all!

This little guy was watching over everything while his buddies ate lunch. too cute!


This gorilla was so cool. I went to the low windows to observe, while everyone else was up above to see the enclosure with out glass. This gorilla came over and played "peek-a-boo" with me , yielding this great close up. Stephen had followed me over there and once the gorilla popped up right next to him, startled him a bit :) didn't get a good shot of the gorilla next to stephen, but this was so fun!


More Zoo stuff to come later, this blog is driving me nuts trying to line up pictures and text.

OUCH!

Here are some pictures of our poor little Katie Kat. She was bitten by another child her same age at a birthday party. There's really no blame involved here, i mean the other kid was all of 18 months, and she is 17 months. Katie often bites when she is frustrated or upset, but having not witnessed this first hand it's hard to say who started this whole confrontation but it's obvious who ended it :)
Now this bite turned into a lovely shiner the next day, a big bruise formed all across the bottom of her eye and she looked like she'd been in a bar fight! LOL! We got asked by everyone what had happened but nobody ever guessed that it was a bite...i mean who ever gets bitten by a toddler in a place like this? OUCH! She got over it pretty quick and even gave the boy a hug later, kids forgive so easily, if only we could learn from them :) And all in all the wound wasn't that bad and healed quite quick, it's been just over a week and not a trace remains of something that looked so swollen and awful! Quite the event.