the purpose of dreams

When Adam and I were first dating, we already knew we wanted to get married, and started talking about what our eventual hopes and dreams were for the future. One thing we both agreed on early on was that someday we really wanted to live out in the country. We wanted to really be away from it all, have a few acres and a big house, preferably one story, with room for all the family to come visit for holidays and stay there forever and have the grandkids come visit. Just something we dreamed about.

Recently we have been house hunting for a second house, we plan on renting out the one we have it's a good size for a rental and we are fortunate enough to actually be able to do that! We are looking for a house that is bigger, that is the main motivation at this point, we know that just being bigger wouldn't be the house we "dream" of but it would be a start, and eventually if we really want the "dream" we'd have to buy again and move again.

Then I found a house. An absolutely amazing house. The kind you see all fixed up on shows on HGTV, the kind that rich people buy and fix up and show off, but not the kind regular people live in right? Except that WE could. We are not rich, and this house is NOT fixed up. But it's everything we dreamed of. It is in the middle of nowhere, it's the capital of the middle of nowhere. :) It's on 3 acres, perfect size to be big but not too much. And it's a very old house that used to be a school when it was originally built in 1925, it has a real feeling of history to it. The classrooms have been turned into bedrooms and each one is just huge! And there are 5 of those HUGE bedrooms. The bathrooms are the one thing that has been updated, so that's nice. It has a huge dining room and table to go with it, and a gigantic great room for company. It really is everything we always said we wanted, it would definitely need some work to truly be the finality of the dream, but it's all there. But now when it comes down to it, it just doesn't feel like we really want to do it. We love it, we love the idea of it, but we're afraid it won't end up being our dream it'll end up being our nightmare. But I guess what I'm wondering here is should we at least try for our dream? I feel like we should, but Adam I think is afraid of getting stuck in something that is going to be a money pit that we can never get out of and that scares him, to be honest it scares me too.

This whole thing just feels like a dream just barely at arm's length away, there are so many dreams we have or want for ourselves or our family, and here's one that with a little reach we might be able to grab onto, but I dont' know if we are even going to try. I guess I'm writing this more for me than anyone else, but dreams, do we ever really get them or are they always just dreams and nothing more?